02.

There isn’t a single force in the entire universe that works on a deliberate mission to screw you up. Some forces you encounter might pull you toward a different direction, and you might follow it because that’s what you needed to do at the moment. That was the path you needed to walk in order to find out, or reaffirm, what your heart truly desires. It’s inevitable that you naturally start to feel heavy as you attempt to follow down that road, as you get further from where you intended to be.

However, there will always be the right forces that nudge you, guide you, and light your way to the right direction. It never leaves you in the first place, even when you can’t see them, even when you forget about them, even when you think it will disappear if you take your mind off of it. That’s how you know that it might be time to take a chance on yourself for once. You’ll know when it’s time to turn back toward the right path for you. Sometimes it’ll take major discomfort — it’ll take what it takes to get you to head to the right direction, even if it means making this place smaller and smaller, until you simply don’t fit anymore despite years of making it a home.

It hurts, it’s hard, but once you get yourself out of the box that you have outgrown, you’ll once again remember how it feels to stand up tall, without having to bend over backwards trying to be something you’re not. Sure, the challenges, the hurt, and the pain will keep on coming as they take on a different form, but this time you get to do it sans the extra burden of putting yourself as the last priority.

This redirection, this recalibration, is just the beginning. The catch is, sometimes it requires you to leave behind everything and everyone you have ever known. All the familiar faces, voices, roads, places, routines, habits — how your day looks like. All the seemingly abundant time you spend with yourself without anybody else for company can make you wonder if you really do love yourself and is content and secure and comfortable with who you are, in this exact place and time. This reassessment is necessary, however uncomfortable it is. It reaffirms where you stand, who you are, and who, what, and where you aspire to be.

I hope once you decide to turn back from what’s not meant for you to follow your destiny, every drop of sweat and blood and tears will feel liberating, at the very least. I hope you get more excited and scared and satisfied that you’ve ever been your whole life. I hope you become the most authentic version of yourself that is not limited by who you once were or who you think you’re supposed to become. I hope this time, with every hardship that would blow your way, they help you sail closer toward your destination, and not anywhere else in someone else’s ideals.